Today’s events reminded me that if I am to survive business travel, better attitude and planning is required, especially as the holiday season attracts less experienced travelers.
I was among the first to board a home-bound United flight. The overhead bins were already filled with large roll-on bags. (I thanked my lucky stars I’d checked my rolling bag, despite Peter Greenburg’s assertion that there are two kinds of luggage: carry on and lost.) We were advised coats were not allowed in the overheads and would have to stay in our laps or below the seats.
The aisle seat was occupied by a woman who had a large rolling duffel, a backpack, and three plastic bags. She confidently wriggled upstream to stow in First’s bins. The middle seat was taken by a lithe lad. Matted hair, gamy, and twitchy, he reminded me of a young logging protester who’d once made headlines by living in a treetop. He seemed oblivious to instructions to turn off electronics. Warned, he returned his iPhone to a handmade knit cover, but for only a moment. He opened his first plastic container before take-off, and throughout the flight carried out a strange ritual of carving into apples with a spoon, meticulously unfurling banana peels, eating avocados with his fingers, shucking nuts and dropping shells, and jumping up in his seat to stretch, presenting his bottom like a Capuchin monkey. When he needed to use the loo, he used the armrests as steps. In between, he lamented the number of people who felt the need to travel.
All of this to say: Keep your electronics charged and your earphones in. Bring light versions of your favorite reading materials. Squooshed in, practice what Gracie calls Pilates breaths. Bring your own snacks — or whatever you can tolerate from airport vendors — but avoid anything too smelly or complicated. Carry on only what you can fit under your seat. (Truly, in decades of travel, I’ve had bags delayed, but never lost.) If your coat can’t fit in a protected spot, have a bag ready to save it from whatever could drop on or seep into it when wadded under a seat.
Most importantly, remember to smile at the flight attendants. Say, “Please.” Often. And, as you’re barreling in from the jetway, take a second to say thank you. Just imagine a whole plane full of us!
